Hawaii and other ramblings

Headed to Hawaii again. These past couple days I’ve truly gotten to see the idiocy of humanity.

Last night was the annual best picture showcase over at AMC Chesterfield. I only stayed for 3 of the films because I had to get up for the early flight to Hawaii. So I saw
Avatar in 3D, Up in the Air, and Precious. More on my thoughts on these films later. Since Avatar was shown in 3D, we had to be in the digital projection theater for that screening and then move to another theater after the film. AMC management had promised an orderly transition from one theater to the other. Everyone would more or less have the same seats that they had earlier. Ha! Didn’t happen.

Well you may say, what’s the big deal about not getting the same seat? This annual Oscar showcase is serious business. People get there early to scope out a good seat that you will be rooted to the entire day. So the move didn’t go well. People didn’t follow the seating honor system partially due to inconsideracy of others and also because we moved to a smaller theater with fewer seats. Yikes! Poor planning, AMC Chesterfield management. The natives didn’t like this one bit and quickly got restless. Refunds were demanded. People stormed out. “Give us a bigger theater!”, a woman cried out. “I’m not going to sit in the front when I got here early!”, said one man. I thought folks might riot over this. In the midst of the commotion, my movie viewing partner, Sue told me that two people had gotten a refund and their seats were available higher up. Off I went to abscond them. These were far better than the two handicapped spots we wound up with post-move. Sucks for you people stuck up front but that was me last year. Five movies from the 3rd row. Like I said, this Oscar movie marathon is serious. You got to be gangsta’.

In between movies, I’m texting and calling American to find out what is going on with the tsunami. I was hearing the worst. Turns out everything was overhyped.

So this morning, I’m at the airport freakin’ early to get a 6AM flight. The idiocy is there in full force as well. There are tons of self-checkin counters open for American airlines yet without fail, a couple has to come right behind me and crowd my space. Seriously?! You MF’ers have the whole row to choose from.

Then I’m off to the security line. Everything was moving along fine until the brother right in front of me had no clue that you can’t have liquids in your bags. He had full size shaving cream, shampoo, etc. and held the line up for ten minutes. What rock have you been under bro?

So I’m in Dallas waiting for my connection to Honolulu. I plop myself by the charging station to recharge my laptop. This lady and her mom have to come right up next to me. There are tons of outlets for charging yet for some reason they want to be intimate. Good grief. What is this magnetism that total strangers have for me? Whatever it is, it’s pretty powerful. If only it worked on the people I wanted it to work on...e.g. Derek Jeter.

The flight is the usual nonsense. The TV screen in front of me is broken so I have to crane my neck to watch Michael Jackson’s “This is It”. The large and in charge heifers always wind up in the emergency rows with the extra leg room. If push came to shove, they wouldn’t even be able to fit through the emergency hatch. American doesn’t give you any food --at all--unless you want to pay for it. And some son of a gun is shuffling cards repeatedly. It drives me crazy and it happened on my previous flight to Hawaii. WTF?! See previous

But I’m trying to keep myself calm. Turns out I have some health issues and my blood pressure is sky high. I could stroke out any minute.

Back to the movies. Yes, I am indeed all over the place. Let me tell you what
Avatar really is. I realized it about 20 minutes into the movie. Yeah, the 3D is cool but after a short time I started to wonder whether the 3D was actually enhancing the story or just a bell and whistle. Even if it weren’t in 3D, James Cameron is pulling a fast one on everybody. Do you know what he has done? Do you know what Avatar truly is? I will tell you. It is “Dances with Wolves”. Plain and simple. Busted up soldier goes and lives with the natives, falls in love, and helps his “new family” take out whitey. Sound familiar? It should. Kevin Costner already did it. All Cameron has done is add special effects and everyone is hailing his genius. Please. Highest grosing movie of all time? Well that’s due to inflation, the increased ticket price of 3D, and the fact that the lemming masses will watch anything these days. That Best Directing Oscar better wind up in Kathryn Bigelow’s skinny little fingers or there will be hell to pay.

Up in the Air - Clooney and cast are pitch perfect. I got a kick out of seeing a few local St. Louis actors and locations around town on the big screen. They used Lambert for a lot of shots. The film was fine up until the last 20 minutes or so. I don’t want to give it away but basically we wind up right back where we started. See it and you’ll understand what I mean.

Precious - Monique steals the show but I got to be honest, I even liked Mariah Carey in this and I haven’t liked Mariah Carey since 1997 (the year she tried to steal Derek Jeter from me). The other lady, who plays Precious’s teacher, her name escapes me...was also excellent. The story is depressing. Precious hits a low, then another low, then another. You never really hit bottom. She turns things around for herself at the end but you’re left wondering, “What’s this girl’s life going to amount to?” Not really my type of movie but it was well done.

So of the 10 Oscar best picture nominees this year, I’ve seen 5. I’m still sticking with Kathryn Bigelow’s “
The Hurt Locker” as the film/director of the year.